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London (sort of) to get new airport

 

The UK government has approved a seventh airport to serve the London region, although quibblers will question whether it should really be advertised that way—it's actually closer to Calais, France than it is to London. 

The airport, which oiperated as Manston International until it closed in 2014, is a former RAF Battle-of-Britain base on the coast of Kent, opposite Calais and Dunkirk. Its new owners have the okay to create a major air freight hub at the field as well as to host passenger flights. At 70+ miles from London, it won't be any Londoner's first choice to fly from, but could attract many flyers along the east coast who would be spared a long drive to and through London.

The private group that bought and will develop the airport is committed to invest about £300 million in the project, and expects flights to start in 2023. They say that the airport will generate around 23,000 jobs, as well as shorter-term employment for airport construction.

Of course, that's all well (except with local opposition to the expected volume of flights, especially at night) but it's also an excuse for reprinting the lyrics to The Mock Turtle's Song from Alice in Wonderland, just for the last lines that might be taken to refer to the airport...

"Will you walk a little faster?" said a whiting to a snail,
"There's a porpoise close behind us, and he's treading on my tail.
See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance!
They are waiting on the shingle—will you come and join the dance?
    Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the dance?
    Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?

"You can really have no notion how delightful it will be
When they take us up and throw us, with the lobsters, out to sea!"
But the snail replied "Too far, too far!" and gave a look askance—
Said he thanked the whiting kindly, but he would not join the dance.
    Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the dance.
    Would not, could not, would not, could not, could not join the dance.

"What matters it how far we go?" his scaly friend replied,
"There is another shore, you know, upon the other side.
The further off from England the nearer is to France—
Then turn not pale, beloved snail, but come and join the dance.
    Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the dance?
    Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?"

The best part of every trip is realizing that it has upset your expectations

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